Entonces, el gran día es mañana... y se suponía que habías descubierto cómo escribir tus votos matrimoniales hace un mes. Lo entendemos, hay muchas cosas involucradas en la planificación de la boda y es fácil evitar escribir esos votos. O tal vez ambos acordaron intercambiar los votos matrimoniales tradicionales y luego cambiaron de opinión el día antes de caminar por el altar. Sea cual sea la situación, ahora tiene que poner lápiz sobre papel, y rápido. Primero, respira profundo. Tu futuro cónyuge probablemente sepa que se casará con un procrastinador y te ama a pesar de todo. Pero aún debe tratar de impresionar a su futuro cónyuge escribiendo algunos votos matrimoniales realmente sorprendentes que parecen haber pasado semanas en ellos. ¿Listo? A continuación, le mostramos cómo escribir votos matrimoniales en 11 pasos fáciles de usar, además de algunos ejemplos de votos para ayudarlo a comenzar.
1. Decide qué tono quieres que tomen tus votos matrimoniales.
No trates de ser algo que no eres. Si eres una persona tonta, puedes escribir votos matrimoniales divertidos. ¿Un poco más sentimental? Votos de boda más románticos pueden ser apropiados. Especialmente el día de tu boda, no quieres ser otra cosa que tú mismo. Ya seas divertido, musical, sentimental o conciso, mantente fiel a quien eres.
¿Una gran regla para escribir tus propios votos matrimoniales? Deben hacerse eco del tono de tu boda, ya sea informal, elegante o temática. Annie Lee, planificadora de bodas de Daughter of Design en Nueva York, Nueva York, dice:“Creo en los votos personales, compartir los pequeños momentos internos de cada día que hacen que las personas sientan que te conocen. Los invitados a su boda deben irse sintiendo que están más cerca de la pareja después de la boda”.
2. Escribe cualquier cosa que te venga a la mente.
De hecho, hay ciencia detrás de esto:la escritura libre es una forma eficiente de verter todos sus pensamientos en una página. De esa manera, puedes verlos todos en un solo lugar. Sin mencionar que hace que tu cerebro funcione y ayuda a combatir el bloqueo del escritor. Piense en:si está demasiado preocupado por lo que va a poner en la página o por seguir una plantilla, nunca escribirá nada. Y recuerda, ninguna de estas palabras tiene que ver la luz del día. Son solo para ti. Y si necesitas más inspiración...
3. Examine fotos de usted y su pareja de su relación.
Si necesita un poco de inspiración sentimental adicional, las fotos de su historia de amor tienden a despertar emociones. Eche un vistazo a sus primeras fotos favoritas de ustedes dos como pareja para recordar los sentimientos del comienzo de su relación. Intente pensar en recuerdos como la primera vez que vio a su futuro cónyuge y mejor amigo, el momento en que supo que estaba enamorado o el momento en que supo que quería casarse con ellos. Ya sea que estos recuerdos terminen o no en sus votos matrimoniales finales, volver a visitar los primeros días despertará emociones importantes (que es la clave para escribir sus propios votos). JP Reynolds de JPR Weddings en Sherman Oaks, California, recomienda comenzar sus votos matrimoniales personales con el recuerdo de un momento en el que se dio cuenta de que su pareja era su única persona.
4. Elige tus recuerdos favoritos.
Después de haber hecho un viaje por el camino de la memoria, ahora es el momento de elegir sus favoritos. Afortunadamente para ti, se supone que los votos matrimoniales son relativamente cortos. Trate de apegarse a uno o dos recuerdos especialmente significativos mientras escribe los votos matrimoniales; los ejemplos ofrecidos anteriormente, como el momento en que supiste que estabas enamorado, son buenas opciones. También puede pensar en algunos momentos difíciles que pudieron superar juntos. Estos recuerdos no necesitan cubrir completamente toda su relación, porque eso es imposible. Piense en los clásicos:cuando mire hacia atrás en su boda dentro de 20 años, ¿qué recuerdos seguirán siendo vívidos e importantes en su mente? Express your gratitude for all that your soulmate has given to you.
5. Think of your guests.
Stay away from inside jokes, because while these jokes may be significant to you and your spouse, you don’t want to exclude your guests. You should also not write anything too personal or embarrassing in your wedding vows — your partner might not be a fan of sharing intimate details with everyone you know!
6. Come up with some promises.
Wedding vows are composed of promises, and both vague and specific promises are needed to make the best handwritten vows. Think big – “I promise to always cherish you,” or “I vow to always be honest about what I’m thinking.” Also, think small – “I promise to always make enough coffee for two in the morning,” or “I promise to comfort you when your favorite team loses.” The promises are also a great place in your wedding vows to showcase both your serious, sentimental side, coupled with your funny side. For every “big picture” promise, you can include a more specific one. Try to vary your language by using words such as, “vow,” “pledge,” or a simple “I will.”
7. Think about the future with your partner.
Of course, that’s what this day is all about. You and your spouse are declaring your partnership and beginning to build a life together in front of your closest friends, family members, and loved ones (or just yourselves, if you're opting for an elopement). At this stage of your wedding vow writing, you should start to think of what you will be doing with your spouse in the future. This part is slightly different from your promises, where you talked about what role you will play in nurturing your relationship. Now, talk about what lies ahead – your goals and the adventures you want to have. This is the time where you can talk about the type of couple you are. Whether you’re an adventurous couple, a career-oriented couple, or an artsy couple, this section of your vows should reflect that. A few wedding vow examples:“I can’t wait to collect art with you for the rest of my life,” or “I look forward to many more adventures to come.”
8. Finish off your wedding vows.
Figure out what you want your last sentence of your vow to be. JP Reynolds recommends saying, “I take you as my husband/wife/spouse” somewhere within your promises and wedding vows:“That phrase is what turns your words of love into a vow.” End your vow with love and emphasis.
9. Edit it down.
At this point in your first draft, you should have jotted down some memories, picked your favorites, made a few promises, and looked toward the future. Luckily for you, procrastinator, wedding vows should only be one or two minutes, max. They may be one of the most important parts of the ceremony, but personal wedding vows shouldn’t drag on. If something’s important, you only need to say it once, with emphasis.
10. Practice out loud.
Anyone will tell you that you need to practice, and unfortunately, even though you waited until the last minute to write your marriage vows, this step can’t be skipped. Practice it once, and time yourself. Then edit it down some more. You’ll likely talk more quickly when you’re nervous at the ceremony, so keep that in mind while practicing — and try to speak as slowly as possible, even if you think you sound a bit ridiculous. Plan where you’ll take significant pauses, and write them in the margins. Of course, don’t put too much pressure on yourself, especially since there’s not much time left before your ceremony. Practice it a few times through until you’re not stumbling over any words and pat yourself on the back.
11. Make a clean copy for yourself.
Even though you’re working on it at the last minute, the copy you bring to the wedding ceremony should look nice, and be easily readable. Make a copy with no cross-outs or eraser marks. Write in where you want to take pauses. Annie Lee of Daughter of Design, remarked that this sheet of paper will become a keepsake and “end up in the wedding video and photos. I suggest a nice note card that matches the wedding colors or a little vow book [a great gift idea!] or pad.” You may want to make two copies, and give one to your officiant, so they can prompt you if needed.
No matter what tips you may find, including these, don’t stress too much over writing your wedding vows. Be concise, but be yourself. You don’t have to suddenly become a wordsmith to create memorable vows. They’ll be meaningful because you wrote them with your whole heart.
Sample Wedding Vows
We asked wedding vow and speech writer Katelyn Peterson, owner and creator of Wedding Words, to share some of her favorite vow examples to help inspire your own:
Funny Vows
"Had I known you were a Red Sox fan when we met, I would have never agreed to a first date. But then I also would have never said yes to this moment and I can not imagine spending my life with anyone else.
Despite your inability to show up on time or your capacity to prank me...
Ignoring the fact that you can't sing and yet, you're still the first one up at karaoke night...
And even though you still wear that Red Sox jersey around our West Village neighborhood...
...I love you and I choose you to be my partner for life.
I promise to cheer you on as loudly as I do my beloved New York Yankees.
I promise to make you smile during the challenging times and make you laugh during the good times.
I promise to love all of you...the parts that make me feel special, the parts that drive me a bit crazy, and the parts that leave me completely perplexed...peanut butter on pickles...really?
Today, I take all of you, for exactly who you are, and for always."
Romantic Vows
"First date coffees turned into one-year anniversary cocktails.
Your apartment soon became ours.
And today marks a commitment to forever.
From the moment we met, I knew you were special.
Your laugh made me feel comfortable.
Your hand made me feel safe.
And your heart showed me a kind of love I'd never felt before.
As we begin this new chapter together, I make these vows to you:
I promise to be the trustworthy and faithful partner you deserve.
I promise to support your dreams and talk through our disagreements.
I promise to love you with my whole heart for my entire life.
We have already created such a beautiful partnership together and I can't wait to spend a lifetime designing more memories with you."
A Mix of Romanic and Funny Vows
"Little did I know when I accepted a job in Los Angeles that my new co-worker would one day become my spouse. But as I stand here in front of you today, I couldn't dream of a better partner or future.
With you by my side, my life is full of more joy, adventure, and kitchen dance parties than I ever thought was possible.
You're the only one who can simultaneously make my heart swoon over your romantic gestures while also making me laugh until I cry.
Throughout our marriage, I promise to care for you when you're sick and to advocate for you when you're too shy to send back your meal.
I promise to protect your heart, your secrets, and your comic book collection.
I promise to spend our marriage making you feel happy, supported, and loved.
You're my best friend and I love you."
Real Wedding Vows
These vows were written and recited by bride Lauren to her husband, Adam:
“I, Lauren, choose you, Adam, to be my husband, best friend, and faithful partner. In you have found the love of my life and my truest friend. Your unfaltering energy, ambition, and generosity are admirable and contagious. You inspire me, challenge me, and remind me to always find the fun in life. You make me a better woman. I will work with you to build a life together and I will strive every day to strengthen our relationship. Thank you for choosing me to love and grow old with. On this day in front of our family and friends, I vow to have the patience that love demands, to speak when words are needed, and to share in the silence when words are not. I promise to support you emotionally and spiritually so that we can continually grow together as one. I will be your greatest supporter and toughest adversary. I will remain your greatest supporter and toughest adversary. I will remain yours in want and in plenty, in sickness and health, in failure and in triumph. I promise to encourage your dreams, honor your goals, and cherish you until death parts us. With all of my heart, today and forever, I love you.”